What's even more frightening is the fact that in all but a very few cases, the act has gone unreported, and the person who committed it has gone unpunished.

• Shame that somehow, she was the cause of what happened to her. That somehow she had done something which brought this act to pass.
• Fear that she would be branded with the stigma of a "loose" woman.
• Fear that somehow she would be blamed for the act.
• Fear of the laughter, the derision, the looks that she would receive as one of "those" women.

And so, a woman who desperately needs help goes without it. A violent criminal who at the very least needs psychological help, at least to be taken off the street, continues to go free.

That's what the "Blue Ribbon Action" is all about. By wearing the Blue Ribbon, you're saying, "I am aware of the problems of sexual violence and I'm doing what I can to help stop it." Wear it at conventions. Wear it to work and church, and when people ask you why, tell them, "I wear it in memory of one woman too many who was the victim of sexual assault and violence."

It's a little thing, really, but it can mean a lot. It means that any woman who has been the victim of such an act herself can see that you are a person who is educated and understands. She can see that you are a person who will not pass judgement on her as if she, rather than her attacker was the criminal.

It's a very small thing, but it could have very big results.

Remember

1. Rape and sexual assault are acts of violence, not passion. "I got carried away," and "She was asking for it," are not valid legal or moral defenses.
2. Victims of sexual assault range from infants to senior citizens, and though only in rare instances, do include males. Contrary to popular fiction there is no "typical" victim.
3. An overwhelming majority of sexual assault victims know their attackers.
4. A legal definition of sexual assault is "Physical contact of a sexual nature which is against one's will or without one's consent."
5. A legal definition of rape is "Sexual intercourse that is coerced through force or threats of force or with someone who is unconscious or incapable of giving consent."
6. One of the most common forms of sexual assault is date rape.
7. Remember, it is still rape, even if:
• you know the attacker
• you didn't cry out
• you didn't physically fight back
• you have been intimate before, but said no this time

Your date may be a potentially abusive person if they:

1. behave jealouly when you talk to another person, even a friend;
2. criticize what you do, wear, and you choice of friends;
3. pressure you to drink more than you want;
4. do not listen to what you want to do;
5. controls your body in small ways, i.e., holding you too tightly, pulling you around by the hand, ignoring it when you pull away;
6. always want to know where you are, and with whom;
7. become angry or violent easily;
8. try to force you into sexual activity that you don't want;
9. degrade you with such words as "fat," "ugly," or "stupid";
10. show interest in others to upset you;
11. threaten physical violence toward you or someone you care about;
12. physically or emotionally harm you and feel remorseful afterward.

Protecting yourself

1. Date with members of a group for the first few dates. Get to know the date before being alone with them.
2. Let someone know your plans. Especially where you are going and when you expect to return.
3. Be clear when setting your limits for touch and sexual activity. Be sure they understand "No means NO!"
4. Have someone you can call for help day or night.
5. A decision to have sex should be mutual. If it is not agreeable to both parties, it is not agreeable at all.
6. If you are traveling alone, keep you car in a well-lighted area, preferably one which is patrolled by security personnel.
7. If you travel alone, or at night, membership in an auto club is a must. If you can afford it, a cellular phone is a good investment.
8. Do not purchase a weapon, especially a firearm, unless you are well-versed in its use and capable of using lethal force in your own defense. A large percentage of women killed during a rape incident are victims of their weapons.
9. If you feel you are in danger, call the police. Any police officer prefers reporting a false alarm to a rape or murder.

If you are the victim of sexual assault

1. It is not your fault! An act of brutal violence has been committed against you by a person who is seriously disturbed. Nothing you did brought this about.
2. Get to a safe place as quickly as possible.
3. Call police and/or rescue services immediately. These people have special training for dealing with this emergency.
4. Do not wash, use the toilet, or change clothes. Vital information for proving the guilt of your attacker can be gained from tissue, semen and hair samples and other physical evidence. They could make the difference as to whether or not your attacker will be convicted.
5. Cooperate with police, rescue and emergency room personnel. They all have special training in these matters, and are there to help you through this crisis.
6. Be sure to be tested for sexually transmitted diseases, pregnancy, and HIV. These are realities you have to face, and the sooner the better.
7. Get professional counseling. You have just experienced one of the most traumatic events a person can go through. Even if you think you are dealing with it well, the feelings caused by this event may come back to haunt you in the future.
8. Let someone you trust know what happened. The support of your loved ones will be a vital part of the healing process.
9. Again, what happened to you was not your fault. You are not a bad person. Nothing about you caused what happened. Sexual assault and rape are acts of violence, not passion.

If your friend or family member is attacked:

1. It was not her fault! She was the victim of a violent crime. She needs your support, not judgement and recriminations.
2. She will need medical attention and the fast response of police investigators. Study the information under "If you are the victim of sexual assault" and be sure to help her follow these instructions.
3. You are a victim of this crime, too. As a loved one, you will have been traumatized as well. There are emergency services in you community to help you deal with your feelings.
4. The most important thing she needs from you right now is your acceptance, support and love. Victims of sexual abuse almost always suffer from feelings of alienation and guilt, thinking that they somehow brought the attack on themselves. While this is patently false, it is a very real feeling. Your support and acceptance are a vital part of the healing process.

Where to look for help:

These numbers are good for southern West Virginia and most of Virginia. Check the Community Services pages of you local phone book for services in your area.

USS Yeager gratefully acknowledges the help of the following in the production of this web page:

• Bluefield State College Counseling, Advising and Placement Center
• Bluefield State College Division of Health Sciences
• Bluefield State College Security Department
• Sexual Assault Services of Crow Wing County

About the Blue Ribbon Project

The Blue Ribbon Action Against Violence and Sexual Abuse was founded by Brenda Lang O'Brien, a member of USS Yeager, the New River Valley Area chapter of the International Star Trek fan organization Starfleet. Brenda has since retired from Starfleet, but her program continues.

Since its inception in 1994, the Blue Ribbon Project has spread throughout science fiction fandom and into the general community. Materials have been distributed at Rising Star, Technicon, Sci-Con, Katsucon, and Shevacon.